I like my space - maybe a bit too much?
Ok, here's the deal - we asked a cadet girlfriend to move in here. She has been watching my kids once a week since January, so we know her pretty well. She was in a bad roommate situation - so we thought we'd give it a try. Afterall, we've often talked about having someone rent our guest room and then help out around the house and watch the kids occasionally.
It has only been 3 weeks and I'm done.
I've been thinking this through alot - trying to figure out what it is about having her here that I don't like. Yes, part of it is that her boyfriend is also here just about every free minute he has. Often times, they are hanging out in the basement during naptime - which is where I usually go during naptime (I can't hear the kids down there). Other times, they are doing laundry right when I need to do a load.
I don't want to say too many negative things about them here b/c I'm a part of the problem too. I just simply like my space! I like to do what I want, when I want, where I want - with noone in my way. Selfish? I try to tell myself that it's not being selfish. Instead I say it's b/c I'm a mom to 2 toddlers who wear me out. I need my space when they're asleep so I'm a better mom when they're awake. This may be true ...
but it is also true that I am downright selfish. I don't like to share my things and especially my space. I'm not sure what to do with this realization.
It has only been 3 weeks and I'm done.
I've been thinking this through alot - trying to figure out what it is about having her here that I don't like. Yes, part of it is that her boyfriend is also here just about every free minute he has. Often times, they are hanging out in the basement during naptime - which is where I usually go during naptime (I can't hear the kids down there). Other times, they are doing laundry right when I need to do a load.
I don't want to say too many negative things about them here b/c I'm a part of the problem too. I just simply like my space! I like to do what I want, when I want, where I want - with noone in my way. Selfish? I try to tell myself that it's not being selfish. Instead I say it's b/c I'm a mom to 2 toddlers who wear me out. I need my space when they're asleep so I'm a better mom when they're awake. This may be true ...
but it is also true that I am downright selfish. I don't like to share my things and especially my space. I'm not sure what to do with this realization.
posted by Lisa Stucky at 2:27 PM
3 Comments:
I have to say that I would be exactly the same way. I think it can definitely be a selfish thing, especially if I am DEMANDING my own space, but I also think I am more of an introvert than I ever realized. Now that I have 4 little people (some of them not so little) around me 24/7, (and they talk TO ME all the time), I do need recharging sometimes and that only happens when I am alone. Maybe could you get away and go to a coffee shop to be alone some? But I know that's not the same as having space in the house. Hang in there...how long is this arrangement?
We're not sure how long she'll be here. She is going home to Texas for a large part of summer - so that will be good. Thanks for letting me know that I am not alone - and I too am more introverted than extroverted!
I've been thinking about your post. I am quite certain I would feel the same way. The reality is that you are in a very different life circunstance than Haley and she has no way of understanding what it means to be considerate of you becuase she has never been in your shoes. She is single, in "love", and (my personal judgment)living her life for her boyfriend. I'm not trying to fix the problem, but wondered if she would be receptive to letting you have the basement space a couple times a week during nap time if she understood that it was your only time for reprieve. I'm sorry it is much harder than you ever imagined!! I definitley need my space to be alone and go nuts when I don't get it. Love ya!
Post a Comment
<< Home